The Awful Truth
by SeddieShipper333
Summary: She stumbles back as I take a stride towards her. Pressed against the wall now, shes trapped. I dip my head down so I can see her beautiful green eyes. We're so close, I can feel the heat of her skin against mine and I can hear her shallow breathes. "Are you afraid?" I whisper. She parts those perfect lips of hers to speak but no words come out at first. "No." She finally gasps.
1. Prologue

**Tribute Training Academy**

**Proudly teaching District two's Victors since 2546**

**Class Schedule:**

**Cato Racewell**

**7:00-8:00 Career Cardio**

**8:00-9:00 Hand-to-hand combat**

**9:00-10:00 Weapons**

**10:00-11:00 Strength Training**

**11:00-12:00 Strategy and Survival**

**12:00-12:30 Break**

**12:30-13:30 Human Anatomy and it's Weaknesses**

**13:30-14:30 Tribute and Sponsor Presentation**

**14:30-15:30 Independent Training**

**We look forward to another promising year and are confidant a victor will come of it. We thank our students and student guardians for their hard work and dedication.**

"Cato! What's that your reading there dear?" My mother's sickeningly sweet voice calls. "Nothing" I mutter. But she's already skipping over to me and snatching the large white envelope from my hands. "Oh, good! You've been accepted into the T.T.A. again. Your father will be so proud! Lartius, come see this!" I roll my eyes and am about to climb the stairs and go to my room but my Mother grabs my wrist with an iron grip.

I groan as my father came around the corner and into the kitchen. "What is it Lavender? I'm kind of busy right now." He sounds irritated. "Your son's been asked to attend T.T.A again." My father snorts, "Call me back when my son's a Victor." I feel my hands ball up into tight fists as I grit my teeth angrily. I rip my wrist free from my mother's grip and without even thinking about it, punch my father right in the face before storming out of the house. I can hear my father hit the ground and my mother shriek in alarm, before the front door slams shut behind me.

I take off running, from nothing or to nowhere in particular. I'm just running because I can. Its probably a long time before my lungs finally start to burn and I feel like I'm trying to breath in fifty pound weights has the cold dry air provides me with much too little oxygen. I slow to a walk, it's cold and windy outside but it feels sort of nice after running so much. I realize for the first time that I had stormed in just boxers. Oh well, I don't care very much right now. I look around to see where I was and realize I'm not far from Clove's house, so I decide I might has well go there since I don't have anywhere else to go.

I knock on the door and Clove smirks when she sees me. "Did your parents kick you out and leave you with nothing but the clothes on your back?" she pauses, "Or butt I should say since there are no clothes on your back." I smile, "Don't even joke Clove, I know you think I'm hot, your probably freaking out internally right now." I grab her shoulders and start jumping up and down, impersonating an excited child. "OMG! Cato's at my door! OMG! Cato's half naked! Now he's touching my shoulders!" I make my voice go high and make a super girly shrieking sound. Clove winces, "Never make that sound again." I laugh. "I won't if you let me in" I tell her.

She moves out of the way and lets me in before closing the door.

"So what happened?" she asks me as I plop down onto the couch. I shrug and tell her casually, "I got accepted into TTA, punched my father, stormed out of the house, and went for a-" I pause to see what time it is,"two hour run in my boxers, then I thought I come bug you." At the last part, I smile at her briefly before looking back to the TV. She raises an eyebrow at me. "Why did you punch your father?" I grunt, lay down on the couch and start flipping though TV channels. "Because he's an asshole." I make my tone firm so she knows to drop the subject. She takes the hint and looks away muttering the word "Okay" and drawing out the 'a'. With that she goes up stairs and returns a minute later with a pair of basketball shorts that she tosses to me. I give her a questioning look, wondering who's they are. I didn't really pay attention but I think Clove wears basketball shorts to work out and stuff, but even if her shorts where unisex they still would be way too small on me. "Who's are these?" I ask as I unfold them to see how big they are. "My brother's, they should fit." I nod and put them on.

I've only met Clove's brother Jupiter, a few times. He won the Hunger Games when he was 18 and he's 22 now, he lives in the Victor Village with his new wife, Cinnamon. I never understood why Clove has to go to Career Training if her brother was already a victor, usually it's the first born child- and that's that- end of story. Clove never talks about her father, so I'm not sure where he is or if he's even alive. Her mother on the other hand is a rather odd woman to say the least. Shes never home when Clove is because she works whenever Cloves home and is home during the time Clove is at training. I'm pretty sure Clove's mom is a prostitute based on the way she speaks of her and her strange hours. The more I think about it the less I understand why Clove is training to be a victor. Who is pressuring her to? Her mother certainly isn't, she couldn't care less about Clove or what she does for all I can tell, not her father because he isn't around, and certainly not her bother, Clove's brother actually cares about her, and hates the idea of her going into the games. He sure doesn't care for me though -in fact, he hates me because he thinks I'm a play boy (which I guess is sort of true), that I banged Clove, caused her to fall in love with me, and now I was just stringing her along, not telling her that I didn't love her back and taking advantage of her vulnerability. The whole second half of course is not true, I've never even kissed her before, much less slept with her- well I guess to be fair there was this one time when she...well you know... 'Did me a favor' but we where both drunk.

"What's the matter with you?" I snap out of my thoughts to see Clove staring at me like I'm crazy.

"Nothing, I'm fine." I mutter as I go into the kitchen. She follows me and sits at the bar stools while I raid her fridge. "Don't you have anything good to eat?" I complain as I open random drawers in the fridge. I'm not really hungry, I'm just trying to keep myself occupied. "There's chicken wings in the freezer." I open the freezer and grab the box. "Cool, do you want any?" She nods. I grab a tray from the cupboard and dump the wings onto it before throwing the tray into the oven and turning it on.

"So did you get accepted?" I ask her. She nods again and hands me her schedule. "We have Cardio, Weapons, and Presentation together." She nods. "What are you an avox?" She rolls her eyes. "No, my tongue is right here see?" she sticks her tongue out at me. "Well then why don't you use it?" "What do you want me to use it for?" she asks in a slightly seductive tone. "Well not for talking, that would get annoying." I use my 'flirting' voice. "Hmmm" she says as she pretends to think about it. "Can I use it to tease you?" "Depends how you intend on doing that exactly." As much as I like flirting with Clove and all, I really need this to stop soon. As much as I want to, I can't sleep with Clove. That would mess everything up. Luckily I'm saved by the bell, the timer for the chicken beeps the second Clove opens her mouth, about to reply. I rush over to get them and change the subject, "Thank God, I'm starving." Clove looks agitated for some reason.

It wasn't until late that night that Clove asks me, "So are you going back to your house?" I wince at the idea of having to go back there and face my parents. But on the other hand, staying here probably wasn't a good idea either, that was just way to tempting, Clove and I alone at night. "I think I'll go to Scarlet's." She was insistent on ensuring me that her parents where never home on Saturday nights, I wasn't really in the mood for the thing that I'm sure we would end up doing but I had to stay somewhere and both, here and home where not options.

Before I have time to register what's happening Clove punches me in the nose and I feel the pain pulsing along with the thick wet blood that is pouring from it. I run my fingers along the bridge of my nose to ensure it isn't broken. I try to contain the blood as I stand up and make my way to the bathroom sink. "What the hell was that for Clove?!" She follows me to the bathroom. "Sorry," she mutters in a way I know means she wasn't really. I lean over the sink and try to not get my blood everywhere. She hands me a cloth and I hold it to my nose while I wash the blood off my hand and out of the sink. I look at her expectantly, waiting for an explanation, but Clove just avoids my eyes and makes it clear that I'm not getting one, but two can play at that game.

"Why did you punch me?" I demand. She tries to act normal, "I thought you would move before I got to you, I gave you like a whole three seconds to react and you just sat there like an idiot." I know that's a complete lie, my reflexes are good. "No you didn't, now I'm gonna ask you again, Why did you punch me Clove?!" She glares at me uncourteously, "I told you why." I'm getting angry with her now, she won't even tell me why she punched me! My free hand clenches into a fist, the other still holding the bloody cloth to my nose. I toss the cloth into the sink. I take a deep breath and try to calm down. "Clove, your starting to make me mad and I need you to tell me the truth because I don't want to hurt you." She looks terrified, good she should be afraid of things that are dangerous. "I... I..." she stutters. "Spit it out Clove!" I demand. She mutters something inaudible. "Louder" I half yell. "I didn't want you spending the night with Scarlet!" she yells.

My eyes widen and I turn towards the sink and clutch it with both hands, suddenly feeling like I need the support. I have to give myself a second to calm back down. "Well, say something" she utters. I let go of the sink and stand up straight, catching a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror, but looking away quickly when I see someone that isn't myself and my normally blue eyes, are almost black. "Fine, I won't stay a Scarlet's." I tell her as I brush past her roughly and leave the bathroom. I stomp down the stairs and grab a pillow and blanket before lying down on the couch and falling asleep.


	2. Drunken Behavior

**Author: Hey everyone, thanks so much for all the reviews, follows, favorites and other support please keep it up! :) I would also like to apologize about the wait, I had actually meant to post this the day after posting the prologue but its been over a week now so sorry about that. This chapter is a little 'mature'. Its about the time that they get drunk which Cato refers to in the first chapter. I tried to keep it T rated for the time being so hopefully its not too bad.**

-One Month Earlier-

I groan as I wake to the sound of pounding on my front door. "Go away!" I half yell half mutter to whoever it is even though I know they won't hear me. My bedroom door is closed and the front door is all the way down stairs. I press one ear against my pillow and cover the other with my arm hoping that they will just leave. But instead my phone goes off. It's sitting on my nightstand and is on vibrate, so it makes a lot of noise as it jolts around on the hard surface. I groan again and feel around on the nightstand for my phone, refusing to open my eyes. When I find it I turn it off and drop it back onto the nightstand. At least the knocking stopped. "Finally" I mutter as I try to go back to sleep, but it's too late. I'm already awake and I know there's no way I'm getting anymore sleep.

Annoyed, I decide to see who has texted me. It's Clove of course. _'Wake up and let me in you idiot'_ she's wrote. I roll my eyes and get up to see if she's still at the door, not even bothering to get dressed. sure enough she's leaning against the door frame wearing a smirk.

"Morning Sleeping Beauty" she chuckles.  
"Morning..." I try to think of a name but come up short. "I'm to tried to think of anything."  
She laughs, "Lazybones."  
"Sunshine."  
She looks at me questioningly, "What?"  
I shrug, "I don't know, morning... sun... give me a break I'm tried."  
She sneers, "It's only nine am."  
"On a Saturday." I add.  
She rolls her eyes. "Whatever, I'm throwing a party tonight and I need your help."  
"Couldn't that have waited until noon?" I ask.  
"No, I still have to invite everyone and get all the stuff." She exclaims.  
"So you predicted that would take twelve hours, or is it in the afternoon like some kind of five year old birthday party?" I grumble.  
She laughs, "No, I just wanted to annoy you by waking you up."  
"Well mission accomplished."

* * *

"Where's Clover? Clovie! Where are you?" I sing as I fumble around Cloves' house. Everything is spinning and I half trip as I make my way to the sink and vomit. I turn to leave the bathroom when I bump into someone. It's Clove. She's so pretty. "Clove!" I yell as I kiss her forehead.  
"Cato, your drunk." She giggles.  
"I know," I pout. Why am I pouting? "But you-you like me anyway right?" I ask.  
She laughs again, "Of course I do Ca-Cato." She slurs.  
"Good." Our faces are close now and we start to kiss each other. Wait didn't I just puke- Clove's lips are soft and she smells like beer.

She closes the bathroom door. "Clooove" I whine to her.  
"What is it han-handsome?"  
"I'm horny" I mutter against her lips. Wait did I just say- Clove is laughing, she has such a pretty laugh, I laugh too.  
"I can fix that" She purrs as she moves her hand downward past my navel.

The world around me spins into a blur of colours and sounds as I slip farther and farther into my state of intoxication until I feel numb and life temporarily drains from my body.

* * *

I moan in agony as I wake up to feel the pounding in my head and twisting in my stomach. I expose my eyes to the blinding light just long enough to see that I'm lying near a toilet -thank god. I crawl over to it and vomit, as I do so realizing that my jeans are around my knees. Oh god that's never good.

Suddenly I feel more awake as the panic surges though my body. My eyes shot open and I scan my surroundings quickly. There's no condom and my boxers and jeans are pulled down around my knees. "Shit," I mutter under my breath. "Shit. Shit. Shit!" I pull my clothes back up and fall back from my kneeling position beside the toilet. I cover my face with my hands. This can't be happening. I don't want an STD and I don't want a baby!

My head protests in pain as I shift to look around the bathroom. I feel like I've just been shot in the chest when I see the girl lying face down on the ground behind me. Even though I'm half out of it and can't see her face I know it's her. The girl's small figure and dark brown hair only fueling my distress."Please no" I mutter as I lean forward and roll the body over, I already know but a small part of me still has to see her unconscious face to accept what I've done. When I see how out she is my next thought is that she's dead and another wave of utter panic washes over me as I frantically place two fingers on her neck. I let out a sigh of relief when I feel her pulse. Then, for the first time I notice she's fully dressed. What? That's weird.

Slowly, cautiously, I put one hand to her hip and pull down the edge of her jeans just enough to see the waistband of her panties. I try to make sense of what happened.

I slowly piece everything together and as I do, the sick feeling in my stomach gets worse. It makes sense now, why my clothes were pulled down and why Clove is fully dressed. I want to vomit again at how much of an awful, disgusting person I am. Clove was perfectly innocent, she was the only girl I had to keep my hands off of and I couldn't even manage that! I mean how hard is it to not screw over one damn girl?! I should be relieved really, I hadn't gotten a girl pregnant and I hadn't let my best friend lose her virginity to me, but I'm not. I feel another wave of nausea and barley to make it to the toilet two feet away before throwing up again. Last night slowly starts to become clearer to me as I see blurred images fading in and out of my memory.

_My drunken self kissing equally drunk Clove shortly after vomiting._  
_Whining her name and then telling her that I was horny._  
_My hands on her chest and her hand on my - 'Stop thinking about it!' I yell to myself._

When I finally feel like I can go a little while before puking again, I stumble out of the bathroom shakily and walk down stairs. But by the time I'm down the stairs my head is killing me so bad, I go into Clove's kitchen to find some pain killer.

Normally I know where everything in Clove's house is since I practically live here. But in the state of my hangover I have trouble telling the kitchen cabinets apart and end up opening every one at least twice before I'm able to register which cabinet is the right one.

Trying to read the labels on the pill bottles was the worst part of all. My blurring vision and pounding head combined with the drop in my already low IQ makes reading nearly impossible. Maybe I'm still drunk. I have to stop once to puke in the kitchen sink before giving up and settling on something that looks close enough.

I swallow two, even though they might be period pain pills and take them dry, not wanting to go though the same process that the pills had required to find a cup for water.

I'm about to leave when I see Clove coming down the stairs. "Hey" she mumbles. "Hey..." suddenly I feel the urge to explain myself, "I was just going" I stutter quickly as I point to the door. "But my head was killing me so I needed pain killers... and... "

I force myself to look at her in the eyes and just like that I know. I know that she knows exactly what happened. Neither one of us lets on to it though, we both treat the situation like it didn't happen or we don't remember. Like its any other hungover morning.

She squints her eyes and takes a good look at the pill bottle in my hand, "I'm pretty sure those pills are for PMS."  
I laugh a little, "Yeah, I couldn't tell if the label said 'Migraine' or 'menstruation'. Then I forgot what menstruation meant, then I got a bigger headache and puked in the kitchen sink -sorry about that by the way. Anyway I decided that these where close enough."  
She laughs, "I wonder if they're going to make you all girly and hormonal." The revolted look on my face makes Clove crack up, she pats my shoulder, "Don't worry Cat. I was just messing with you."  
I glare at her, "Not funny."  
She only laughs more, "Yes it was, you thought you where going to start sobbing over some sappy romance movie. Curled up on the couch beside some balled up tissues, empty boxes of chocolate, and old issues of fashion magazines." I cringe at the thought, she still hasn't stopped laughing, "What did you think you where going to grow lady parts too?"  
"No!" I defend, "Now shut up."  
"Oh come on Cato, you gotta admit, its kinda funny."  
I roll my eyes, "Fine." I mutter as I try very hard not to laugh and fail.

**I hope you like it, please tell me what you think. I will try to post the next chapter on Tuesday or Wednesday.**


	3. Grubby Old Bathrooms

I hate the start of the school year. Of course there's the obvious of it being school and having to learn math and English crap between ridiculous workouts but what I really hate about it is bulking up. See we get one month off in the summer. Most students including Clove and I will still workout but no one follows as strictly as they do at the academy. Which means that the first month is ten times worse. Everyone gets put on tougher workouts and bigger diets to get them back to where they want us. All the while the trainers bitch at you for not being able to keep all the muscle on. Not to mention everyone is throwing up. See all the students including the girls are fed crazy amounts of protein and carbohydrates before and after workouts in order to build muscle. Then we work out until our our lungs are burning and your limbs feel like falling off. So the result of course is puking. You get out of class for a while, but its not worth having to eat the unappetizing food all over again. Classes start at seven am and end at three thirty. From seven pm to nine we go to a classroom to learn everything else. Mostly math and English. Then you go to sleep and do it all over again, six days a week eleven months a year. We don't have classes on Saturday, but we do have to workout still.

Clove and I both live only a five minute walk or so to the academy, so we don't live in residence but you eat all your meals at the gym weather you live there or not it's a requirement. It's six fifteen when I wake up in the morning. Ten minutes to shower and dress then a five minute walk and breakfast from six thirty to seven before classes start.

Breakfast consists of heaping amounts of food as does every other meal. Everything is calculated very particularly so you really don't get to choose much. Today I have to eat a massive bowl of some gross cereal, two thick pieces of whole grain toast with some spread- I think it's sunflower oil and honey or something like that. I also get a fruit shake and scrambled eggs. I sit across from Griffin.

"Hey." I say as I sit down.  
"Hey." He returns, his mouth full of food. "Sorry I couldn't make it to that party the other night, how was it?"  
He's referring to _that_ party. "Fine." I lie.  
He raises his eyebrow at me suspiciously, "Did you do something...?" He asks.  
I shovel a huge bite of food into my mouth as an excuse to not have to talk and shake my head no.  
Clove sits beside me. Sometimes Clove will go and sit with her girl friends but usually she sits with me and my friends. Her plate is similar to mine but less, though still way more then you would think she could eat. "What are you guys talking about?" Clove asks.  
"Oh I was just asking Cato about your party, sorry I missed it. Anything interesting happen?" Griffin says.  
Clove's cheeks get pink. "Nope. You didn't miss much."  
I think he can tell what's going on here. He's not an idiot and we're being awkward around each other now that its on our minds, shifting away from one another and avoiding eye contact.  
"Cato." He presses in that accusing but entertained way.  
I glare at him.

Luckily more people come and sit with us so the subject gets dropped.

"Everyone ready for another day of hell?" Ares asks as he sits at the table with us along with Cliff and Trav. We all groan at the reminder of our long day ahead. "What about you Sweetheart? Ready for some fun?" Ares purrs as he leans in close towards Clove.  
I feel like tearing Ares into a billion pieces right now, but Griffin is eyeing me carefully and it forces me to contain my anger.  
"My name is Clove not Sweetheart." She states with a sneer.  
"Speaking of names, do you now what Ares means?"  
"Asshole?" She suggests with a fake smile.  
"Nope, the Greek god of war. Also quite good with the ladies... or so I'm told." He adds smoothly.  
I want to puke but instead I spew stupid facts, "He also had an affair with Aphrodite. Her husband captured the two in a net of chains and hung them from the ceiling for all the Greek gods to see and laugh at." Everyone's looking at me weird because I don't usually say anything even vaguely intelligent. I look at Clove now, "I'm just saying, that sounds like _great_ foreplay." My eyes glancing over to Ares quickly as I speak.  
Cliff, Griffin, and Trav burst out laughing to the point where people are looking over at our table.  
Clove's face flushes pink. "Cato!" She hisses under her breath.  
I just shrug at her dismissively and turn back to my food. She'll get over it.

I was painfully wrong about one thing. Clove is still mad at me by the time weapons class is over. Its really starting to piss me off. This isn't the first time I've given her degrading comments. I know that probably makes me sound like a total asshole -and lets face it, I am. But she knows I don't really mean it, at least I thought she did. This is the first time that she's continued to be angry for this long so when I find her walking to her next class in the hall I grab her shoulder forcing her to turn around and look at me.  
"Go to hell." She spits as she escapes my grip and tries to get away.  
I grab her arm and drag her towards the staff bathroom that's been out of order since my freshman year. No one is ever there.  
Except she's yelling like crazy "Stop Cato! Let go of me! Don't touch me!" Luckily this type of thing is not uncommon here. When you take a bunch of high strung teens and teach them how to kill with their bare hands you better believe there's a fair share of fights breaking out. So no one has payed us too much attention yet but the way Clove's hollering I know I'm going to be in trouble if she keeps it up long enough.  
I spin her back around to face me and clamp my hand over her mouth so that the sound is muffled.  
"Would you shut up?!" I demand. "People are going to think that I'm rapping you or something."  
At first she just looks irritated with me but her face changes at the last part. She looks infuriated and terrified at the same time.  
I roll my eyes, "Calm down Clove I'm not going to rape you! God." I'm disgusted that she would even think that, though I was the one that said it in the first place.

_Nice going Cato, that's how you get her to stop being mad: 'threaten to rape her!' God I'm so stupid._

I drag her the rest of the way to the bathroom and close the door tightly behind me. I release her from my grip but stay guard at the door to ensure that she stays put.  
"What the hell is going on with you?" I insist.  
She gawks at me, "What's wrong with _me_?"  
"Yeah you!" I snap.  
"I didn't do anything wrong!" She accuses.  
Now I'm really pissed off because I have no idea what her deal is here. "What? What did I do Clove?! I'm the same person I've always been! Sorry if you have a problem with that!"  
She shakes her head angrily, "You think this is a joke Cato! I have no idea why the hell I told you that I liked you but I guess I expected that the guy I've know since Kindergarten and my best friend would at least respect me enough to be honest!" She fumes.  
Honest? "What wasn't I honest to you about?" I insist.  
"The fact that you don't like me! I mean that's fine I get it, but could you please stop being an ass about the whole thing? I realize that's hard for you to do." She says the last part sarcastically.  
"But I never even said that Clove." I never told her that I didn't like her.  
"That's my point! Just tell me how you really feel instead of talking about 'foreplay'!"  
"I only said that because I was mad at Ares. I'm sorry okay?"

Her head is tilted down and she's swallowing hard. Oh god please don't freaking cry. Her hand reaches up to her face, confirming my fear. Shit! Clove's never cried in front of me before. But there's been times when things happened that made me think that she might and that always scared the crap out of me because I would have no clue what to do or how to act. "Can I go now?" She asks in her shaky voice. I jump away from the door so fast you'd think it was on fire or something. She leaves and I'm left alone listening to the thick metal door slowly squeaking to a close and being reminded of the night we where drunk as I realize that, like that night. I'm in a bathroom. A stupid grubby old bathroom. Where the blue paint is chipping off the walls, the floor tile is discoloured, and the smell of sewage is prominent. Well I guess its fitting really.

* * *

**AU: Obviously there's some conflict happening I didn't want them to just get together right away. They have been friends forever, Cato has been with many girls and Clove hasn't been with anyone so it just didn't make sense to me for them to have such a smooth transition. Clove thinks Cato doesn't like her and Cato is having trouble dealing with his feelings as it is something so foreign to him. And yes, they will get into the arena eventually! Though that's not for a little while. I'm not as happy with this chapter but oh well. Also, its my birthday on Thursday and nothing would make a better present than reviews! Please review I LOVE feedback. Oh and next update is Tuesday or Wednesday! (I almost forgot.) **


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